Searching for a job can get seriously overwhelming.
Any kind of excitement you had before the search began swiftly gets replaced by the realisation that everyone else is more qualified than you and you’re never ever, ever going to get a damn job. And that feeling can kind of be a downer.
But it doesn’t have to be like and there’s one simple reason why: we overestimate the competition and underestimate ourselves.
I’m willing to bet that you’ve seen an advertisement for your dream job but you didn’t even apply because it just felt so out of reach.
The competition
But let me tell you something – people aren’t as smart or as proactive as you think.
Every time you get that feeling that you’re not good enough or that everyone else is smarter than you, I can guarantee you at least 20 other potential applicants are having the exact same thought. And they don’t end up applying either.
We all have these ideas about what successful people look like and feel like and we convince ourselves that we’re not one of them.
Plus, it’s easier on the ego to use “I didn’t apply” as an excuse, instead of thinking “they picked someone else over me”.
Just do it
But you need to get out of your own head.
Stop thinking about all the reasons you won’t be the one to get the job and just apply.
I struggle with this stuff too – I know it is really hard to get out of your own head and realise that you may actually be the best person for the job. So one thing I like to do (and this could sound weird…) is to speak to myself like I’m speaking to one of my friends.
I wouldn’t try to convince my friend that they’re not good enough to apply. I’d tell them all the reasons they should give it a shot, all the reasons they should try. So why should I tell that to myself?
What do you think?
Is there something you didn’t apply for because you thought you’d never get it?
Don’t forget that comments are always welcome and appreciated – I’d LOVE to hear from you!
Sam xx
Another fantastic post, Sam! I absolutely love this (which I know I say a lot but it is especially true for this post)! I think for me the tough part comes from critical thoughts from my dad, who kept pushing me for the next degree, the next credential, and I never once heard that I was good enough as I was, even after graduating from one of the top colleges in the country with honors. I finally just realized that I should go ahead and start now with what I have while I pursue my doctorate. Love, love, love this, Sam!
Hey Alex,
Thanks you so much for your kind words!
I’m so happy to hear that you realised that you are already good enough! I think it’s really easy to get trapped into always looking out at the horizon – we always want more and we’re never, ever, ever going to reach it!
You are good enough exactly as you are today.
And congratulations again for graduating with honours! Wooohooo
Sam xx
I try to keep that in mind every time–applying is half the battle! Especially if it requires cover letters or recommendations, I think about the people that won’t apply just because of the extra effort and feel better! There’s nothing to lose, and the worse that can happen is you don’t get the job either way.
Hey Jen,
Thanks for sharing your thoughts! I LOVE your comment because it’s sooo true – there is nothing to lose. I think, for me at least, a lot of the reason I don’t apply (even though I don’t want to admit it) is an ego thing.
There’s only so many times I feel like I can be rejected but I’m starting to realise that being rejected time and time again is so much better than never really trying in the first place!
Sam xx
When I applied for jobs, I was in the same mindset as the goal for the Starbucks challenge. The worst thing is they don’t call me back or I don’t get the job. One of the best advice that my professors told me was that someone out there is looking for someone like you, be it in work or life. Your job is to help them find you. So even if I get rejected, I just had to trust in the fact that someone wanted the best version of me.
Hey Alex,
Thanks so much for your comment!
I LOVE the advice your professor gave you – that your job is to help someone find you. It is such a good way to take yourself out of a lack mindset because when you’re in a lack mindset you’re making decisions out of fear and they are never the ones that truly serve you.
Such great advice thank you so much for sharing!
Sam xx
Great post, Sam! I’m enjoying reading your blog! You remind me of me!
Hi Amanda,
Thanks so much for your comment!! I don’t know whether that’s a good thing or a bad thing 😉 but I’m glad to hear that my blog resonates with you!
Sam xx
When I went to National Portfolio Day in New York my Father reminded me that I have everything to gain and nothing to lose. I was so nervous but what my dad said really helped me become more confident showing people my work.
Carolinebogush.blogspot.com
Hi Caroline,
That is such an amazing remind to get from your dad! We really do have nothing to lose!
I love the Steve Jobs quote ‘remembering that you’re going to die is the best way to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart’
Sam xx
My goodness, this is on point. I graduated four years ago (2010…recession…scary…no bueno) and had the exact same misconception about myself and others. Why would anyone hire me? I was average at everything I did, and never really found my niche…I now refer to it as well-rounded 🙂
I settled for an internship which ultimately led to a full time job at a large company, and quickly realized how deeply I underestimated myself. Being positive and easy to work with will get you so far. Just use your common sense, have a good attitude and the rest WILL fall into place.
Hi Claire,
Thanks so much for sharing your experience! And ‘being positive and easy to work with will get you so far’ is such an amazing reminder for me! I think I always underestimate the importance of those things and overestimate the importance of having specific experience! Thanks so much!!
Sam xx
Hi Claire,
I’m currently going through the same situation you had recently (graduating 2011, recession). As I struggled to job hunt when I graduated, I decided to be brave, drop everything and do something I always dreamed of: travel to Australia. I have now lived here for two years on a WHV and recently gained a de facto visa which could lead to Permanent Residency (hurray!!)
Because of my working restrictions on the previous visa, I ended up working in call centres as it was good money and flexible. However now I’m looking into returning to fashion/retail I am struggling so much, with my self esteem and even questioning my own capabilities.
I just wanted to thank Sam and yourself for making me realise I’m not the only one struggling with this and I’ll definitely ‘favourite’ the page so I can read whenever I get that niggling doubt again!
Hi Alex,
Thank you SO much for sharing your experience – I really appreciate it!
I’m sorry to hear that you’ve been struggling but I’m sure you will be able to find a job that you like soon! It’s often really hard to see the struggle as a good thing but I think that once you’re out on the other side you will see just how much you grew as a person through this experience!
And great decision moving to Australia, I hear it’s a pretty cool place – especially Brisbane 😉
Sam xx
This is sort of the same thing I’m going through at the moment, I’ve been offered an interview for a job I applied for months back. I have to book in to have the interview and I can’t bring myself to do it as I’m worrying too much! I keep thinking I’ll hate it or I won’t be any good. Just need to bite the bullet and do it I think!
Alicia
Hi Alicia,
Thanks so much for sharing your experience!
I think it’s so crazy how the mind works! In situations where we have absolutely nothing to lose we play out all the possibilities in our head, pick the most negative one (that also has the least amount of probability) and fixate on it – I do it all the time!
I know the mental barriers can be a struggle but I hope you organise the interview! You will be amazing (they did ask you for an interview after all) and if you hate it you can always change paths.
Sam xx
I just thought I’d let you know, after reading this post I went and booked the interview. I had the interview last Friday and got a call today saying I was successful! Thank you for the support, I think it was the final push I needed!
Alicia x
Alicia I’m so happy to hear that!!! Congratulations and all the best with your new job!
And I think this serves as proof that the only thing holding us back is ourselves! Our egos want us not to try so that we have a good excuse when we don’t succeed but I think we’ll be so much more successful and happy if we just put our doubt and fear aside and give it a try! Go girl! And thank you so much for letting me know – I really appreciate it!!
Sam xx
I drive myself crazy at the moment, thinking about the future and just how bad it is going to be, because I have the wrong degree, other people have much better degrees and have better internships and so on… so much so that I am scared of graduating and makes me procrastinate on writing my final papers. As if that is going to help.
Truth is, if it is going to be bad it is going to be bad, regardless if I start worrying months ahead or not. One can scatter so much energy with these negative thoughts. And they are not going to help sell yourself in an interview either.
But you know what is funny? People tell me, “Oh, it will be easy for you, because you have it together and are so organized… etc. but for me…” while in reality I feel like a headless chicken. So most likely the people that are more accomplished than me might feel the same. That evens the playing field in my head.
Hi Nathalia,
Thank you so much for sharing your experience – I really appreciate it!
I totally agree with everything you say and I think that it we all kind of feel like a headless chicken while everyone else thinks that we have it all together (at least that’s how I feel)
Good luck with your final papers!
Sam xx